Its two days after the show and I am trying to get my head back on straight because I know there is a lot of work to do still over the next eight days. The Tampa Bay show ended up being just the kick in the ass I needed to let me know that I still have what it takes to be a competitive IFBB Pro and even more.
I didn't really fill any of you in on the pre-show jitters or thoughts that I had because a competitor usually does his best to block those things out and stay positive. Now that the show has passed I can talk a little about things that go through your mind in the final weeks whether you are an IFBB Pro or simply doing your first local show.
After the Houston show I refocused and decided that I was going to attack Tampa with a full head of steam to try and redeem myself. That being said I still had doubts all through the final weeks of my prep, thoughts of uncertainty if this was really for me or if I had what it takes. Being mentally tough and having courage to me, means having those fears and going through with it anyway, so that's what I did.
All the way up to the final day before the show I was still feeling unsure of myself and uncertain if I wanted to go and feel another disappointing performance. Still I kept to the plan that Chad and I had worked out and decided I would do my best and let the chips fall where they may. In the end the Tampa show proved a few things to me but one most importantly. If I work as hard as I can in the gym I can achieve a level of physique that is competitive and that is enough for me to keep working towards more.
On August 9th I showed up in Tampa with the best package I could bring, it wasn't the best package of the day nor was it the best package that I in vision in my mind of one day having but it was the best I could do with what I currently have. The judges I believe saw that and rewarded me, putting me in the top five along with Darrem Charles, Dave Henry, Dennis James and Toney Freeman, all athletes I look up to and aspire to be like.
Now the show is done and after all the congratulations and good feelings its time to get back to work as next weeks show is going to be even harder than Tampa Bay. Along with the four names I mentioned there are others like Johnnie Jackson and Erik Fankhouser who will be throwing their hats into the mix. Not to mention I have a couple photo shoots lined up, so the good times and celebrating will have to wait for another week or so.
On a lighter side of things I have realized that my militant work ethic that I use to diet isn't so militant...lol. I mean I always listen to Chad Nichols and I always fulfill contract obligations with MT, MMI and GASP since they all are very good to me but somethings when left to interpretation may not be construed the way they were meant to be. For example, Chad says to me I can have a good meal after the Tampa Bay show and enjoy myself. These words were like death to my conditioning. I went out after the show to this meal:
Large Plate of Nachos
Tortellini
Chicken Avocado Salad (extra large)
Extra Large Fudge Sundae
Large Cookie with Double helping of Ice Cream
That was one meal!!! Whats wrong with me. I woke up the next morning and my head was shaped like a basketball with two slits in it that my eyes could barely see through. I said to myself its okay I'm sure the other guys did the same thing. So I go down for breakfast, I wasn't gonna eat much just some eggs and cereal and you know a healthy breakfast but not really a diet breakfast. I see Toney Freeman, down there and he looks like he is still on stage. Chiseled face and all....later I see Dave Henry with the same look. So I am starting to wonder, am I really a bad bodybuilder, these guys stay strict and I'm off stuffing my face. Then I see Nicole Ball (she won the women's BBing the night before) and she also looks shredded still. So I say to her, wow you still look great didn't you have anything sloppy to eat last night, she says 'I had a muffin and a coffee with cream in it'..???OMG a muffin and a coffee! After hearing that I felt like the worst bodybuilder ever and needless to say it got me right back on track.
I got into the hotel here in Dallas on Sunday and started busting ass on the cardio machines and it will continue until I work off that glutenous meal I decided to have without thinking. Anyway, just a little tip for you guys, when someone says 'if you think you're working hard someone else is working harder', I just learned that saying is all too true.
Sacrifice Without Regret,
Fouad Abiad
